A LOCAL woman who left a 16-year abusive marriage is raising awareness about the support available from a local charity to people affected by domestic violence.
Splitz is an independent charity and provider of domestic abuse support services in south-west England.
In Wiltshire they offer a number of services to people affected by domestic abuse and sexual violence, including a befriending service, workshops to help build confidence, support groups, and an outreach service.
The charity also works with male perpetrators of domestic abuse who wish to change their abusive behaviour via a voluntary programme.
Speaking to Melksham News about how the charity helped her when she left her husband, the woman from Bowerhill said, “I was married for 16 years – there was domestic violence throughout the marriage. But this all came to an end on 19th February 2017, when my husband assaulted me and my son who was 13 at the time – that was the final straw.
“Splitz provided me with support to keep me going. I was left with four children to look after on my own. My ex-husband had isolated me from friends and family by moving 10 times in seven years – I had no one.
“Splitz helped me to build my confidence back up. I attended a ‘Making Changes’ group, which helped me to start socialising again by meeting others who had been in a similar situation. Their ‘Building Bridges’ scheme also helped with my confidence and getting back into work.
“I was also given a Splitz ‘buddy’ who was just amazing. They would visit me at my house – I was suffering from anxiety, so they would visit me to make sure I was okay.
“Splitz was the only support that I had – they provide such an important service, and they rely heavily on donations to deliver their support. I’ve been fundraising for them – but I want more people to know about what they do. Domestic violence still happens, it can happen to all people in society – people need to be aware.”
The Bowerhill resident is also trying to raise awareness about the difficulty parents have after leaving a domestic violence relationship when the perpetrator applies for access to the children.
The BBC’s Victoria Derbyshire show reported last month that at least four children have been killed in the last five years by a parent with a known history of violence, after a family court ordered they have access to their child.
Dozens of parents also revealed to the BBC that their abusive ex-partners had been granted unsupervised contact with their child.
The Bowerhill resident said, “Men are still being allowed to abuse their partners through the court system. I am still going through the courts as my ex-husband is wanting access to our children. Social services has told me that my children could be taken away if he is allowed access. But I am struggling to fight the case as he is controlling me financially.
“I have had to spend my savings, inheritance and my children’s savings to try and keep my children safe – I have been wiped out.
“I have equity in the house, but my ex-husband is preventing me from selling – he is still controlling me, and the courts are allowing him to do so.”
For more information about Spitz in Wiltshire, visit: www.splitz.org/wiltshire
